Some common custody schedules for 5 to 13 year olds are: An alternating weekends schedule with a midweek evening visit. “Visits should be frequent and relatively short in duration because the child has a short attention span.”. School age children are very flexible in their development and can adapt to a creative parenting plan. “What a two- to three-year-old is able to do versus what a teenager wants to do is different,” says French. This will help you know what is going on in your child's life and learn about problems quickly. Making a parenting plan for a 5 to 13 year old, Making a custody schedule for a 5 to 13 year old, Get help with school age child parenting plans and schedules. Age of the Child “What a two- to three-year-old is able to do versus what a teenager wants to do is different,” says French. School age children do better in school when both parents are involved in schooling. Stephanie Weiland Knarr, Ph.D., a licensed clinical marriage and family therapist and relationship expert in the D.C. area, agrees. Children this age gain self esteem as they accomplish things in school and learn new skills. A session like this would provide a red flag that Mom’s house might not be very functional and that Dad’s house is a safer place for the child to be. You have a lot of options for choosing a schedule that works for your situation. “Or if Dad works from 7 a.m. to 3 p.m., it’s hard for him to get the kids on the bus in the morning, but easy for him to pick them up in the afternoon.”. As the child gets older, parents should look at how well a child does while away from one parent or the other. School age children understand concepts of time and routine. If the answer is “No,” or “Not much,” then maybe you should save the argument for another day. Parents can take them out to dinner and do little things  with them during the other parent’s “time.”. Wanna talk high-stakes in divorce? This schedule … School age children are more comfortable with separations from parents because of school, spending time with friends, participating in extra activities, etc. It’s absolutely a challenge. If the court sets the parenting schedule, the child may miss out on these important events. Hi Dr. Laura, ... but separations of more than 5-7 days are never recommended for a seven year old. Kids should ALWAYS be able to phone and email each parent at all times so that connection is honored. A 2-2-3 schedule where the … Here are some things you need to know about 5 to 13 year old children to make your parenting plan more effective. But after a ... Two answers to this question. It’s not very glamorous. Their friendships become very important to them and they are mostly friends with members of the same sex. Your child should be okay spending time in both parents' homes. “Flexibility is based on the situation, and hopefully parents are flexible on day-to-day things and can work together when it comes to big things,” asserts French. Your parenting plan should allow your child to participate in activities and both parents should be supportive. An every extended weekend schedule or every weekend schedule where your child spends weekdays with one parent and weekends with the other parent. A parenting plan for a school age child has all of the information of a basic parenting plan, but it is customized to fit the needs of a 5 to 13 year old child. Parents’ work schedules can also play a part in custody schedules, especially when one parent works odd hours. For example, if a child is tardy for school 15 times in a semester while she is at Dad’s house, but not tardy while she is at Mom’s house, it’s an indication that Mom’s house is more functional and something is preventing the child from being on time to school while at Dad’s house. The 3-4-4-3 schedule, which has your child spend 3 days with one parent, 4 days with the other parent, then switches. Emotions can cloud decisions, making crucial changes for the family fraught with serious conflict. Don’t forget that you can choose your battles. “Rather than being caught up in the number of days, think about the quality of time you’re spending with your child and enjoy that part of it.”. All rights reserved. If the co-parenting relationship is volatile, conversations about parenting schedules can be stressful and counter-productive. For quick, reliable and affordable help making a parenting plan and custody schedule, turn to Custody X Change. 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